The Promised Poetry (part 2)

Now for the second poem. I'm sorry if these make you sad, but it wasn't my choice. That dang tiger picked this topic!

**

Disappearing Act

Here I am...
putting on a smile every day,
pretending seeing him doesn't break my heart,
being the supportive friend
...
when all I wanna do
is kick
and scream
and cry
and whine
until I get my way.
I just wanna run away
and hide from it all.
From all my mistakes.
From the fact that he's over me.
I just want it all to go away.

But here I am
putting on the same old smile;
pretending I'm okay,
putting on a show,

pretending I don't hate myself.

**

So there's that one.
I would like to mention...if it's not already known, that I do write from personal experience. (I realize I might have said that in another post, but I'm too lazy to actually check.)

Not sure what to do next post. Possibly AVPS...

The Promised Poetry (part 1)

Yet again, it's been a while...but life sucks and I can't always post. So here goes.
Now to choose the topic of poetry... Love Poems, Powerful, Uplifting, Frustrated, Angry, Depressed, Fear, Letting Go, or Just Friends.... "eenie meenie minie moe" time! *options were crossed out after deliberation* Depressed it is. And I couldn't decide on one...so you get two.

**

When All is Said and Done

Dead eyes stare back from the mirror.
The mirror I wanna break.
The mirror I wanna shatter.
I want it to break like my heart did.
I just wanna disappear.
I wanna hide;
from him,
from the world,
from myself.
I look in the mirror,
the dreadful mirror,
and see a stranger.
I see a zombie.
Impossible to look away,
the dead eyes find my soul
and tear it apart -
bit by bit,
piece by piece.
Until I have nothing left.
I look in the mirror,
the painful mirror,
and see a ghost.
The dead eyes are mine.
Nothing is mine.
Nothing but
emptiness,
loneliness,
hurt.
Dead eyes stare back from the mirror.

**

So there's that one. Remember, the category is "Depressed." So it makes sense for the message to be painful. Anywho, leave your comments...

Foods is the Bomb Diggity Yo!

I realize that it's been a long while since my last post. It was also a very dull one...only one comment.. That kind of says it all. Ha. Still, I know I promised poetry, but I'm not sure where my binder is so...hence the topic of Foods. And not just general types of foods, I mean the class, Foods.

For those of you who don't know what that class is, it is a class I took my sophomore year of high school. Essentially you learn about foods, how to cook them, and really you just learn how to cook. Therefore, I cooked almost every day for an entire school year, and got graded for it! Foods was the greatest class ever, for several reasons: 1) I took it with a ton of great friends - inside jokes galore, 2) I got to make/eat some really yummy things, 3) we cooked food I would never have had the guts to try making myself - and now I have the recipes :D 4) I LOVE FOOD! and 5) it was one of the easiest classes I've ever taken. I shall further elaborate on each of those points. :)

1. Taking any class with great friends makes it a blast, but for Foods, they just took the experience over the top. We actually had groups that we cooked in all the time, and we each had our own kitchen. There were five people total in my kitchen and we had so much fun. Also, I had another friend in a different kitchen, but hers was right next to ours so that made it okay. There are so many inside jokes from that class, and nearly all of them are still referred to today. :) good times, man.

2. Sooo many yummy foods! We made calzones, pies (crust included), crepes, stir fry, salsa, egg rolls, crab rangoons, krumkake, baklava, angel food cake, twice baked potatoes, gyros, and a ton of other things that were all so delicious. My favorite thing we did though was probably the gingerbread houses. Right around this time every year in Foods, each kitchen makes a gingerbread house that gets graded and judged. The fun part about the gingerbread houses was picking a theme and picking out all of the secondary edible elements of the house. My kitchen did "Candyland High" And there were so many cool things: there was a rainbow mural on the back of the school, a multi-candy walkway up to the door...and because one of our gingerbread pieces was misshapen, we came up with the story that the school was hit by a tornado, and an earthquake, and a hurricane, and pretty much any natural disaster you could think of. It was great :) Oh and another cool thing, the entire class made a Thanksgiving dinner that is offered to the teachers (and they actually pay to get a plate!). It was so cool.

3. Calzones, biscuits and gravy, a stir fry that we picked the ingredients for, gyros, and even salsa! I would never have tried those on my own before taking Foods. It really opened up my taste in food, so I tried a lot of things from different countries too.

4. I do love food. I love to eat. I love Italian food the most though. Then I'd say Mexican comes after that. And then Chinese (but like the takeout stuff). German foods I grew up with...like burgers and brats. As far as French, the crepes were so good...but French food is so extravagant and luxurious and rich. Some Scandinavian foods were good too. I think the baklava was from one of those countries...either one of those or Germany.

5. It was the easiest class ever. The only thing I had troubles with was the homework. Not doing it...just handing it in. I sucked at that. Haha.

So, yes. Foods. Best class ever.

I think I hit all the points I wanted to...let me know if there was anything I missed.

Definitely poetry next week. Love ya'll. Please comment

Here We Go Again...

First of all, keep commenting on "A Proposal..." :)

Okay, on to the pertinent stuff. It's that time again...time for the giving out of the NUMBER ONE FAN AWARD! Yay! I know you all love this boring-ass super fun ceremony thing :P So I shall officially commence with it and stop boring you to death.

Again, this award is based on the merit of the readers' comments of the past and probability of their future comments. It is simply a reward for LOYALTY, which only one of my readers seems to have.

Therefore, the winner of my

#1 FAN AWARD

is The Cooler Jacobs once again. Congratulations. And keep it up!

I recommend that everyone else amp up their commenting. Do you really want The Cooler Jacobs to win this EVERY time? I sure hope not. It would send to oblivion the reason I started this award! I want you to compete for it! I want it to be an honor! I want you to comment more so I don't feel like I'm just talking to myself here!!!

But I still love you guys...as much as you disappoint me... 

COMMENT!!

Next post is definitely going to be poetry. Something mellow and not too exciting. I have to calm down my posts a bit. Can't get too antsy or angst-y... :P

Long Time No Post :(

Come on people!!! Only one comment on "A Proposal..."????? You can do better than that!

Anywho... I wasn't sure what to do this post on...but I just got an idea. :) This past Friday, two fabulous things happened. First of all, I began watching AVPS (A Very Potter SEQUEL) with The Cooler Jacobs, and I saw The Muppets in theaters. Starting with the first, I'm sorry to let you down, but I will not be talking about AVPS this post. We didn't get to finish all of it, so another time :) But The Muppets. I did not grow up on the muppets, I had never watched anything to do with them. But that doesn't mean I was completely oblivious to their existence. I knew who Kermit was, I knew who Miss Piggy was, I even knew who Fozzie was. Still, seeing this movie was a very interesting experience for me. I wasn't sure if I would like it or not - never having been exposed to the muppets before.

Let me just say, it was awesome :) Not only because of the appearances of three people from two awesome shows, but because I found it really cute and heartfelt. But back to the three people. Number one - Jason Segel, a.k.a. Marshall of HIMYM :) He was the leading man! (not the leading muppet). Secondly, we saw the fabulous Jim Parsons, a.k.a. Dr. Sheldon Cooper of TBBT (The Big Bang Theory). It was such a wonderful surprise, so I won't ruin it for you :) Lastly (but surely not least important) NPH HAD A CAMEO! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love NPH so much :) :) :) Although, I believe he should have had more of a role than he did. His wit and charm would have added just that much more to a great movie.

Hence, I strongly recommend seeing The Muppets. Preferably in theaters so you can enjoy the entire greatness of those three actors. :) I also recommend commenting on "A Proposal..." One comment is not enough! And you ARE allowed to comment more than once. We need a huge list! As disappointing as it was to see only one measly comment, I still have faith in you - my fabulous readers. So get to it!!!! Love you guys <3

Next post I'm thinking some poetry...mellow this thing out a bit :P or possibly something that's a bit overdue...

A Proposal...

So...it's been a while since I posted last, and I apologize for that. Dance has been so crazy, today was the first school day since it started that I didn't have practice! Hence, Monday's may become my new blogging day. :)
I'd totally do more poetry, but then it would possibly become the sole reason for this blog's existence...me getting comments from my friends on stuff I've already heard their comments on time and time again! Haha

Now on to the good stuff...

I have an idea. Now bear with me dear readers... I want to create a giant list of that's what she said jokes. This task may be daunting, and it may seem ridiculously laborious, but I promise you that we can do it. Nothing is impossible when 4 bored minds come together!! Those being ours of course :P
I shall start the list in my post, but after that it must obviously continue within the comments. Let's do this thing!! Oh and Beaf, you are only allowed to use up to 5 from the list we already began on paper - which is so lame compared to the internet!
Oh, and once we complete our list, I'll actually make it a list and put it on my blog home page so we can view our work proudly without having to go through each and every comment over and over again. Sound good? Okay, now let's do this thing!!!!

1. Ah! It's coming right at me!
2. It was definitely not what I was expecting.
3. (the classic) It's so sticky!
4. I can't take it anymore. I'm about to explode!
5. Aww, it's in my hair!

**please continue the numbered format in the comments. Thank you!!
can't wait to see what you come up with and don't forget to comment on any new posts as they continue to be posted!

"Special" from The Specials Collection

She takes a breath
slow, deep,
savoring every moment.
Her eyes open with a flash of green.
Standing in the calm,
it almost seems like everything is okay.
It seems perfect.
The light breeze cools her face,
calms her after the run.
Everything seems perfect,
but the green eyes flash again,
back to reality.
Back to the fight.
Her heightened hearing tells of a danger,
fast approaching.
She cannot be found.
Must run again.
But where?
The danger is closing in.
All around her people scream.
Her eyes close once more
and she braces for impact.
But it never comes.
Another staggered breath.
The screams have stopped.
Her eyes open, a flash of -
blue.
Time has stopped.
She steps out of the ruckus
and leaves for her new life.

With the Gods on her side?

**

The first I've written for this collection. I had no idea it would take the turn it did as I was writing. It was as if the poem took on a life of its own and I was just the messenger. I was just the person chosen to bring it to life. When a writer feels something like that, it is a huge moment, a huge bound in their writing career. And I'm so grateful (and surprised) that I was lucky enough to be one of those lucky few writers. And you are all now a part of that moment and that realization. :)

"Unvoiced Desires"

Where I am weak, and
afraid, and
shy,
you are strong, and
brave, and
open.
You are everything that
I am not.
And somehow
when I'm with you...
I become those things too.
You complete me,
you have what I am
missing.
You make me the person
I've longed to be.
Craig Charles Gwin,
I love you
and I need you.

And I long for you to
hold me as you once did.

I long for you to need me
once more...

**

Well there you go. It's kind of old, but it's one of my favorites. I write a lot from personal experience and such so there isn't much that doesn't have personal pronouns...but there are a few of them. Since this one was on the short side, I'll post another one...probably a narrative one or one from my new collection. I'm trying something new - writing a series of narrative poems that tells a really big story..Kind of like a book, but very different. It's exciting and truly challenging :)

HIMYM and the Glory of NPH

Another acronym for you! HIMYM = How I Met Your Mother :)

What can I say about HIMYM? Clearly, it's a wonderful show - or I wouldn't be writing about it, but to explain it is difficult. KIDDING, it's so easy to explain. It's funny, there's lots of sarcasm, there is a gorgeous man that's a main character, Minnesota is frequently mentioned, and so is Canada. Oh and a few more things to mention: The Pineapple Incident, Slap Bet, The Bro Code, and Barney Stinson.

If those things aren't enough to convince you of the amazing-ness of HIMYM, maybe this will... one more acronym! NPH = Neil Patrick Harris. NPH is the best part of the show. Oh, and did I mention that NPH = Barney Stinson? Cause it's true. An awesome guy/actor playing another awesome guy...that can't turn out to be anything but glorious :)

NPH is almost the sole reason to watch HIMYM. He is the most glorious person ever. He is gorgeous, funny, and unfortunately gay :( Why must he be so cruel to the women of this world?! Still, he does a fantastic job of playing a straight man. A straight man who is also a man-whore. Aahh, what else can I say about NPH? He is just amazing. He's Barney Stinson!
NPH is not only in HIMYM, but several movies as well. I've seen him in Starship Troopers, Undercover Brother, Dr. Horrible, and Beastly. He is such a versatile actor, it's crazy. AND HE CAN SING!!!!! Not just like, acceptable singing either. It is full on amazing, perfect singing. :)

I think I have done enough obsessing over NPH for one post. Perhaps I'll do a post on only NPH. I'm not sure when it will happen, but I'm pretty sure it will. He is just so awesome, I can't run out of stuff to say about him. :) So a post just on NPH should be up sometime soon-ish. :)

What should my next post be about? If I don't get any ideas in comments by midnight tomorrow, I will do some poetry. That is a promise :)

Number One Fan!

Okay...I know this is only my seventh post...but only 7 total comments?! It makes me feel like a bad blogger!

So, based on both present comments and overall promise of future comments, I have decided to give out a Number One Fan award. I will be doing this roughly every 3-4 weeks from now on.

Including all of my previous posts, there were three readers that commented. Although one of those readers commented twice, rather than the other two commenting only once, I have decided that their overall promise of future comments is lower than that of another reader. The reader I speak so highly of is none other than The Cooler Jacobs.

CONGRATS 'THE COOLER JACOBS'!!  You are the first winner of my

#1 FAN AWARD

Wear this title proudly, and keep up the comments. You never know when someone will sneak up and take the title from you. 

It's All About AVPM!!

Youtube is such a glorious place where so many wondrous things are discovered. There's the Hunter videos, Dramatic Reading of a Break Up Letter, all Eminem music videos, and of course AVPM!!!
For those of you not cool enough to understand acronyms, AVPM stands for A Very Potter Musical, and it is the the best thing ever! AVPM is a fan-made musical that is also a revised and summarized plot of all the Harry Potter books. Now to explain why "It's All About AVPM!!" there are several things I must cover, ordered from least awesome to most awesome (but even the least awesome is AWESOME).

10. The Horcrux Finding Amulet - there is an amulet that detects the presence of horcruxes and apparently speaks to you and tells you where they are. :P
9. Malfoy is played by a girl - it's a short chick, and she wears a blond wig that is constantly adjusted throughout the play (which is played off as Malfoy calming himself). And her accent is hilarious.
8. Everyone has a Zefron obsession - there is literally a poster of Zac Efron in Dumbledore's office. Also, Dumbledore is wearing a High School Musical shirt for the entire play.
7. Dumbledore is kind of a jackass - he is consistently mean to Hermione and Malfoy. Insulting them at almost random points
6. Cho Chang is white - pretty self explanatory...but she also has a (terribly fake) southern accent.
5. Malfoy rolls on the floor A LOT - at entrances, when moving across the stage, and when talking to people.
4. Ron is ALWAYS eating - at one point he even has a giant Hershey's bar.
Jealous! I WANT A GIANT HERSHEY'S BAR!!!!
3. Darren Criss - just awesome. End of story right there.
2. Voldy and Quirrell - ah, what a pair! So adorable!!!! :)
1. VOLDY!!!! - he is the most adorable, misunderstood, funny guy who just needed to be loved. :):):):):):):):) [plus the actor - Joe Walker - is SUPER hot :)]

I would love to say more, but I've given away too much already... I know it sounds crazy right now...but I promise that it is fabulous! It's funny, witty, and there is excessive swearing - which I always love.
I hope I have convinced you to make the best and most important decision of your life - to watch AVPM.

By the way there is also a A Very Potter Sequel! And they are probably making a threequel!  LOVE!! :D

To Obsess or Not to Obsess...TOTALLY OBSESS!!!

There is an illness, an undiagnosed illness. It affects more people in this great country than is realized. It is a sometimes debilitating illness and those who suffer from it have been known to (frequently) cause harm to others. The illness is powerful, possessive, and occasionally dangerous. And it DOES have a name:
It is called "Obsessive Compulsive Perfectionism" (OCP) and it is very similar to OCD, only much more severe. Instead of suffering from multiple compulsions, they suffer from only one - and it is to have everything be perfect. The side effects of this illness include: high stress levels, mood swings, periods of mania and depression, hair pulling and/or loss, lack of sleep, and amazing grades. There are several other side effects that were not mentioned.
Ha! I love the idea of this. It's so out there and crazy and just plain logical in a weird way. I've got some odd friends and they have some even more odd justifications for their "odd-ness." And it is hilarious to hear what they come up with! OCP is just one of them :)
I'm just playin'! I love my gurls. :) And I only make fun of them BECAUSE I love them. It's just how my sick, twisted, and warped mind works. o_O
I wish I had more to say on the topic of OCP, but this ended up being a very short blip of weird brain activity...OH WELL!!
Ha. Well, if anyone out there is reading...please tell me SOMEONE is...hit me up with some comments about future posts. I'm running out of awesome shit I come up with myself!

Men in Tights...or Spandex

Picture if you will, just for a moment...men in spandex. And not the fake shit, the real, stretchy, tight, clingly stuff.

My school witnessed this phenomenon at an assembly after school today. Some were repulsed, some found it hilarious. I believe it was both of those, plus some extra sexual attraction...damn some of those guys have nice asses!
'What the fuck kind of school do you go to where you see football players in spandex at assemblies' is what some of you may be thinking. But believe me, it isn't any type of radical, new-age school. It's just a school that cares. Let me explain.
The entire shennanigan started with fundraising for the Eagles Cancer Telathon. All the fall sports sold t-shirts to raise money. The football coach then made a mistake by challenging the volleyball girls to a selling competition with the football team. Whichever team sold less shirts had to do the other team's conditioning drills in front of the school. As you can imagine, that would put the girls in shoulder pads and the guys in...spandex. The volleyball team, as underdogs, were victorious over the football guys and today was the magical day where the whole school got to see the 'junkular region' of every football player enhanced through the spandex. 

From a very sexual woman's point of view (that being my own), it was at first giggle inspiring, but once the workout started it quickly became repulsive. The boys had to run and jump and squat and crawl in their spandex and we got to witness the whole thing - unedited. My point:
Dudes should NEVER wear short shorts. They may have nice asses. And they may have some killer legs (indirect quote from Amanda), but those legs don't get tan...and don't get shaved.

So ladies, if you ever see a guy in short shorts or spandex, please slap him across the face as hard as you possibly can. Do it for America if not for yourself. Come on, we all know as chicks that there is a deep urge and compulsion to just randomly slap some guy. Chicas - here is your chance to experience that quintessential moment! Sieze the opportunity if it arises! Again, if not for yourself, do it for AMERICA.

However, watching those guys do that workout was fulfilling...and hilarious. NO MORE COMPLAINING ABOUT WARRIORS!!! :D At least, that should be the case :)
If I can, I shall get a video up of the assembly so you all can see what I got to see today.
I must ado to my man's house :) Another post soon. Again...comments welcomed/recommended for options for my next post :)

Attack of the School Day

Blech. School. Homework. I gotta write a paper for my English class using 4 fiction sources (3 if using all novels). And I need to find connections to a common theme in each one. I do NOT like this assignment! I have two sources already and we're supposed to be researching more right now...but I'm a procrastinator. To the max. So far though it hasn't really done any damage to my grades. I've got fabulous grades :)
But hey, I'm a senior bitches! Finally. I've been waiting for this year since I could understand what a senior was. Ha. So many awesome things this year. Valleyfair, Senior trip to the Dells, and prolly a ton more awesome stuff. I can't wait to be done. I gotta get out of this shithole. Heading to (prolly) Mankato for college! Ready to rock that shit out. But my wench is gonna be far away :(

I am so bored. School is dumb and I wish I could ditch. But no, I don't have my license, and it's all my parents' fault. I nagged and nagged but they didn't get me into classes until now! So I'm taking driver's training as a SENIOR, every weeknight for two weeks from 6 to 9....and still sneaking out after midnight every night to see my man. Oh yeah, and then getting up for school the next morning at 6:30. At least there's no school the rest of the week! MEA ya'll!!! I get to do nothing for three days :D

But alas, the school bell calls me to my next adventure. I must leave you now :(
However, another post will be coming soon! I hope that has you on the edge of your seats.
Next post I'm thinking poetry...or whatever my fabulous readers suggest!!!

Starting Out With a BANG!

Okay so check this (I talk like a gangster every now and then BTW), I'm on a dance team at my school - like the kind of dance team where we go to competitions every goddamn Saturday during December and January. And as much as I love the other girls on the team, they wear on my every last nerve! We went to see the new Footloose today as a team; let me just explain what that entailed: a half hour car ride there AND back. Like I said, I love those girls - they're my homies - but I am just not the type of person to be happy and excited all the fucking time, and some of them are.
The season starts November 1st and even though it's my senior year (finally, thank FUCKING GOD) I don't know how I'm gonna survive!! At least my wench (a.k.a Bea - my best friend) is also not a peppy person so we can do our own shit during the season.
Like party our asses off! And by party, of course I mean sit on our asses at my house and do absolutely nothing.
But legit, I love to dance. Dancer til I die bitch! I've been dancing since pre-k. That makes this...like....(basic math OMG) my fourteenth year. I do kick (for dance team), lyrical, some jazz and a little bit of hip hop. It's funny...as much as I talk like a "G" I do not like to do hip hop. It just ain't my thing. Lyrical is though. Lyrical is the shit! Same with contemporary, even though I haven't been able to try it :(  In what other kinds of dance do you get to actually show what you're feeling?! Or use any kind of emotion other than a gigantic fake smile the whole time? Lyrical is real.
For reals though...I'm tired as fuck...and I better get some sleep before I gotta sneak out to go see my man :)     oh yeah, and I've got school tomorrow. LAME!!
nighty night my dears :):)

Me, Myself, And I

Hey, just wanna let ya'll know what this blog is gonna be about. It's pretty much just a place for me to get all my random-ass thoughts out into the world. I'm a crazy mo-fo so I just wanna warn you that now. One day I might be putting some lovey dovey poetry on here, and the next I'm ranting about my fucked up love life. So if you still wanna stick around to get to know me, go right ahead.

If there are any readers out there, I just wanna say I shall be loyal to you and love you always! And reply to any comments as soon as I possibly can :D

An actual post (declaring my randomness) will be up soon!